The Port-O-Let Convention taking place on Kings and Shreveport-Barksdale in Shreveport is about to come to an end.

Mic checks are boring. 

But, lately, mic checks where I work are creative, entertaining and downright fun!  Some of us had grown weary of the same ole, “Mic check 12345,” and have vowed to put the excitement back into the pre-newscast audio checks. 

For instance, the other day, when our audio guy/celestial expert Sid asked for a mic check, I responded with, “Um, Sid, I’m a little too busy to speak into the mic right now.”  I, of course, thought this was hilarious and extremely creative.  Sometimes Fletch will pretend he’s talking without making a sound, which leaves the crew scrambling to fix a non-existent problem.  Clever.  ”I love it when he does that,” says audio guy Rex Allison.

Something to keep in mind while wearing a microphone is that we (reporters, anchors, weather and sports people) can hear each other’s audio checks through our earpieces.  Recently, while Gerry and I were on the set, Corrie Cross was prepping for her live shot in the newsroom.  When asked for a mic check, Corrie responded with, “Could Sherri Talley be any more of a cougar?”  That, of course, left me with a slight question as to whether Miss Cross knew I could hear her.  Nice one, Corrie.

Pictured: KTBS audio guy Rex Allison   

I try not to use cliches because I usually don’t use them correctly.  Plus, they’re so cliche.

Here are some examples of botched cliches.  Add your own!

“Tomorow should be a smooth playing field.”  –Joe Haynes

“Throw another blanket on the fire.” –Sherri Talley

“He’s running around like a chicken with his nose cut off.”  –Tony Casson

Shreveport Police this morning captured a local man wanted for attempted armed robbery.

They went to a house on Cleveland Street and found the guy hiding inside a sofa between the cushions and the springs.  Police used the word “extricated” when talking about removing the suspect from the sofa. 

To me, that’s a good hiding place.  Obviously not good enough, though.

Another less-than-successful attempt at hiding happened earlier this year in Phoenix when a suspect ran away from a traffic stop and slipped under a parked truck.  He was promptly run over when the driver pulled away.  He later complained of back pain.  

A few years ago in Syracuse, a burglary suspect was being transported to jail when he kicked out a window of the police car and dove out headfirst.  Still handcuffed, he ran and ducked into a building and hid behind a door.  Bad hiding place alert!  The building was the sheriff’s office.

These suspects obviously need some fresh ideas for hiding places.  If you were on the run/on the lam/at large, where would you hide? 

(L to R) KTBS 3 News interns Tressa Allen, Martha Tingle, Taylor Willis and Orin Smith

Our newsroom, like others around the country, is being reorganized as the industry changes.  Webcast Studio B was built in the conference room.  Meeting rooms, edit bays and other areas are being re-purposed.

This is “The Loft”.  For decades, it’s been known as the place not to go in search of an old piece of footage you need for a story. 

Most reporters would rather write around the need for old footage than venture up the creaky stairs to “The Loft”, where racks of tapes were rumored to close in on the brave soul who dared to enter.   The floor was sticky.  You heard things.  Stephen King could have garnered enough inspiration for a lifetime of thrillers in this small, dark, dusty area.  

It’s tough to imagine all that now.  These courageous interns dedicated part of their Friday to help Operations Manager Trey Lankford and other staff members reorganize the tape system in the newsroom.  20 years of tapes were boldly categorized for easier access for news purposes.

And now, a house for history doesn’t seem so haunted. 

Maybe I’m hard up for a laugh today, but  I found this hysterical.  A co-worker sent it out to lighten newsroom stress today.  Worked for me.  It came from Newsblues.

Okay, it’s a slow boring post-sweeps, after-Memorial Day kinda day in the TV news business. So, your Surly Editor® offers these ten suggestions for spicing things up and making your co-workers think you’re an absolute nut case:

1- On your lunch break, pick up a box of condoms at the pharmacy, go to the check-out counter, and ask where the fitting room is.

2- In the memo field on your checks, write “for marijuana.”

3- Tell your children, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.” Ask which one shall it be? 4- Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat.

Go ahead.  You know you want to click here.

…corraled a horse while on a bike on Ellerbe Road. 

Go ahead, especially you, Tommy.

I once…

Thanks, Mel, for forwarding this.

Harvest gold, olive green, Herbal Essence, The Brady Bunch…