Who thought of this?  It just sounds weird.  Can’t we do better than Hurricane Bill?

What?  You think I can’t read what you’re sayin’ here? 

I go outside and all, and even though I can’t catch squat, I hear things.  So what I’m heavy set?  Most of the nation is.  I don’t see you makin’ fun of cats without tails and stuff.  And where are all the Healthwatch 3 For Felines programs? 

Somehow I think all this ridicule started either when Trish came over for Christmas Eve and was shocked at my ability to block her exit with my sheer presence or that one time when I sat on Hazel and Jimmy and Child Protection was called. 

Anyway, just know that CALICO now stands for Cats Are Loved Inspite (sp) of Casual Obesity.  

“They” seem to know when we start to really like a product or service and they yank it straight from our souls!  It’s like there’s this database of what we like too much, and when “They” are alerted to a dependence, “They” crush our aura by sucking our beloved items off the face of the earth. 

What “They” don’t know is that we have garage sales, Craigslist, eBay and Amazon.com.  It might be tougher for us to stay connected to the items we still cling to our hearts, but we find workarounds. 

Here’s my list (it’s mostly stuff from the 1970s):    Brooks Victress running shoes, 10:30 Candy Bars, drawstring bellbottom Coca Cola pants, Peter Max clothing, the color avocado green.

Would you chose your baby’s traits?  I know there was a brief time when Dan Talley wished he had!

There’s a fertility place in Los Angeles that claims it can help prospective parents design their baby’s features.  Mom and dad hopefuls pay to increase the liklihood of getting selected eye color, hair color, etc.

The process is called pre-implantation genetic diagnosis or PGD.  It was created to screen for disease, then used for gender selection.  Now, it’s being used for cosmetic purposes.

So, what happens if you’re not happy with your designer offspring’s looks?  Can you put him/her back?  Get your gazillions $ back?  What kind of message does this send to your child about inner beauty?

What if something goes wrong? 

I know what Spuff DIDN’T do today…clean house, pay bills, and I’ve yet to see a solution to world peace out of that fur-covered, pointy-eared brain of hers.   The quality of pets from the animal shelter has really gone downhill.

What do they do all day?

Blogger Suzie in North Carolina has squirrels in the attic.  Can we help a sister here? 

“I have tried EVERYTHING!  So don’t ask me if I have tried this or that!  Bro and sis opinion needed.  Those damn squirrels are chewing my house.  I know where they live and I go up in the attic and they sit there and they stare at me.  I bought a pellet gun last night……thoughts before I become a squirrel murderer?”
 

What if we could vote today for most effective delivery/service people and all the others would have to adhere to their standards?   

In the process of selling stuff I don’t need or want to make room for other stuff (more later on my new love of Craig and his list), I’ve encounter delivery experiences that would make you want your mommy. 

My specific rant is with the hours-long delivery window, in which you’re expected to wait in your home (even if saving the world requires you to be elsewhere) forever, so your service or delivery can arrive in the last two minutes of the window. 

Pinning some companies down to a more specific time within that window isn’t easy.  Oh sure, you can try.  But do you really want to waste even more time?

I passed on several social opportunities with friends to stay home tonight and enjoy some peace and quiet and get a vision for my furniture rearranging efforts. 

Not really.  I had nothing else to do.  

So, when reading about rearranging, I ran across a Feng Shui site.  WT!  I have relatives who live by this, but now, I’m afraid not to!  Should this be a part of the political platforms with which we’re presented?  Here.  Look!

“Whatever you do, make sure your feet don’t point out the door while in bed. In traditional Chinese culture, this is called the “Death Position” because the deceased are carried out feet first. Practitioners believe sleeping this way can drain your life force. If you can’t avoid it, use a footboard or a substantial trunk or other piece of furniture at the foot of your bed to act as a buffer (this is the one exception to feng shui’s normal “no footboard” rule). Finally, leave enough room around the bed for energy to flow freely, and for each partner to get up with ease. ”

Where does Sarah Palin position her bed?  If I’m in danger and I’m just a citizen, I want my potential government leaders to be well positioned to lead this country.  Can Sarah Palin see Russia from her bed, even if it’s in the wrong Feng Shui position?  C’mon, Charlie Gibson!  Ask the right questions. 

And how much did that study cost? Remember this study that came out this time last year…”European researchers find that children are smarter than chimpanzees.” 

I’d like to see similar research on the people who decide which studies to fund.