“I miss y’all.  I swear, there is no one in this building that I can talk to like this and not get myself slapped and my hair pulled.”–Colleen Spillane 11-07-07

Peggy (Sher’s neighbor):  “I’m sorry to hear that you reinjured your ankle.”/Sherri:  “Thank you.”/Peggy:  “I think the Lord just wants you to sit down.” 10-31-07

“Talk is cheap.  It takes pictures to get thrown off the air.”–Jim Roberts 10-25-07

“2700 Lindholm.  Person falls out in the middle of the street.  Chuck 21 on the way.”–Anntonette Dennis 10-24-07

“Do you think I would get in trouble at work if I drew a picture of a stick figure with a gun?”–Officer Billy Mott, SPD 10-23-07

“We should have gotten video of John Georges eating dinner at George’s.”–Chris Redford 10-16-07

“There’s nothing wrong with talking to yourself as long as you don’t go, ‘WHAT?’”–Jim Roberts 10-09-07

“I have no sense of sense.”–Lindsay Holman Atkins 10-03-07

“Music soothes the savage breast.”–A deacon at Trenada’s church 08-12-07

“I guess I just became bisexual…uh, I mean ambidextrous, and I got used to it.”–Gary Hines 08-13-07

“Daddy, you don’t need to worry about my life or the things that I do.”–Jackson Bain 08-01-07

“Did you guys hear I fell out of Earthlink today?”–Tim Fletcher 07-31-07

“It’s fun to have fun.”–Sherri Allen 07-30-07

“I couldn’t get my Ironman tattoo because I had to go to the U.K.”–Suzie Talley 07-27-07

“You can never have too much medication.”–Jim Roberts 07-06-07

Thanks for your comments! There are more quotes to come, some that date back to the 1980s. I just have to clean out the garage to get to them. In the meantime, here are some more.

“You know when you’re stealing fish out of the buffet line, you’ve got a gambling problem.” David Paige (photographer) 03-22-02

“I just figured out a T.V. show that would get huge ratings - Touched by a Charlie’s Angel.” Randy Patrick (assignments) 04-24-02

“I thought Sponge Bob was a piece of cheese.” Nellie Johnson (assignments) 06-18-02

“I AM intimidating! I LOVE it!” Jim Roberts (reporter) 07-10-02

“It must cost more than I thought to go bowling as a woman.” Tim Fletcher (sports director) 09-03-03

Chris Redford (reporter): “I don’t care if you’re a druggie and you robbed and shot your grandmother, you don’t deserve to die in a crime.” Charles Hadlock (anchor/reporter): “Unless your grandmother shoots you.” 09-03-02

“Can we have a little salsa music in your El Nino story?” Jim Roberts 11-08-02

“Hillary says it takes a village. I say it takes a mom and dad.” Jim Roberts 03-07-03

“We should get a mug of the knife-wielding transvestite.” Chris Redford 04-30-02

For years, I’ve collected quotes from newsrooms where I’ve worked. Here are some of them. Enjoy!

Newsroom Quotes

• “It’s never too late for makeup.” —Jeff Jamison, meteorologist 01-16-02
• “At the state fair, it’s really easy to throw your corn dog stick on the ground because everybody else does it.” —Keith Hightower, Shreveport’s mayor 01-16-02
• “You go outside and practice falling down and I’ll be out there in a minute to finish kicking your….” —Sherri Allen, anchor/reporter 01-18-02
• “People don’t say sot and oaf like they used to.” —Craig Day, anchor/reporter 01-22-02
• “If you eat standing up, it doesn’t count.” —Melissa Parkerson, community affairs director 01-23-02
• “Authentic is such a fake word.” —Sherri Allen 01-30-02
• “Just because you’re laughing when you say it doesn’t mean others will think it’s funny.” —Chris Redford, reporter 01-30-02
• “I’ll say anything I can pronounce.” —Craig Day 02-01-02
• “I just got all hot.” —Janet Reno, U.S. Attorney General 01-30-02
• “Would somebody get the microphone off the drunk guy?” —Chris Redford, referring to a priest 02-09-02
• Colleen Spillane, producer: “I’m fixin’ to use this edit bay!”  Sherri Allen: “Is there enough toilet paper in there?” 02-13-02
• “When you got a garbage truck and a bottle of whisky, men will follow you, even if they’re the police.” —Nellie Johnson, assignments
• “It’s the case of a rare monkey that was stolen and traded for drugs.” —Gary Hines, assistant news director 02-25-02
• “Some people should never be naked.” —Christine Wong, anchor/reporter 03-01-02
• “I go into their cages to take care of them and they don’t kill me.” Tim Mills, exotic animal keeper 03-04-02
• “I can’t be quoted!” —Charles Hadlock, anchor/reporter 03-11-02
• “I don’t know about you, but I could have slept with a dead mouse in my mouth and my breath would have been fresher than it is now.” —Tim Fletcher, sports director 03-12-02
• Sherri Allen: “An oxymoron would be like, jumbo shrimp.” Randy Patrick, assignments: “Or, smart sportscaster.” 03-13-02
• “Lindsay, that’s a left handed bat!” —Kevin Fentress, tape operator 03-25-02
• “They’re going out of their way to recruit women so they can have a more broad based government.” —FOX News reporter 04-02-02
• “Half of those vehicles wouldn’t be driving so fast if they didn’t have so many cops behind them.” —Chris Redford 04-02-02
• Meg Green, producer: “Did I make quote of the day?”
  Sherri Allen: “What did you say?”
  Meg: “Nothing.”
  Sherri: “Well, then no.” 04-10-02
• “Stop the violets!” —Tim Fletcher, referring to Sherri and Gerry both wearing purple on the news set 04-12-02
• “Are you lactose intolerant?” pickup line overheard at a party 04-12-02
• The next eight quotes are from those who tasted manna bread healthy eater/reporter Barbara Stewart brought to work:
• “That’s tongue-scratchin’ nasty!” —Colleen Spillane
• “Can I blow a bubble with it?” —Darrin Wilson, master control engineer
• “It tastes like it was made with grass clippings.” —David Paige, photographer
• “I used to feed my horses better than this!” —Jim Lee, satellite truck operator
• “Manna means no taste!” —Viki Fentress, producer
• “Manna stands for, ‘Man, I left something outa this!’” —Gerry May, anchor/reporter
• “Leave it for the night crew. They’ll eat anything.” —Rod White, photographer
• “Prisoners sue for stuff like this!” —Randy Patrick, assignments
• “Yes, I would like to take a to-go order out.” —Jeff Jamison calling Chili’s 12-29-02
• “What are you doing, making a sandwich?” —Kevin Fentress to Barbara Stewart as she was writing notes on a stack of Post-It Notes. 09-25-02
• “Sure it’s complicated, but hell, it’s fun.” —Charles Hadlock, on air 09-30-02
• Sherri Allen: “Is that Barbara who got flowers?”
  Lindsay Holman: “That’s her lunch.” 09-23-02
• “It’s gone by pretty quick. It’s gone from six to three minutes in about….uh,
  three minutes.” —Michael Moore, photographer
• “My hair fell faster than a leaf in a Rick Rowe story.” —Sherri Allen
• “Bossier Police are still trying to figure out why they found a man dead.” —reporter on another Shreveport news station 07-24-02
• “Can you tell me what time the 10:00 news will be on?” —Caller 07-17-02
• “This city would be really deadly if people would learn how to shoot.” —Jeff Nitz, photographer 07-17-02
• Sherri Allen LIVE: “Sister, we’d like to present you with this plaque for your 50-years of service to Holy Angels.
  Sister Concetta: “Well, it hasn’t been 50-years.” 06-12-02
• “Why don’t they tax toilet paper or something everybody uses?” —Chris Redford 05-31-02
• Driver near a local hotel: “What’s going on here?”
  David Paige, on the scene, “Somebody just got shot.”
  Driver: “Are there any other hotels around here?” 05-21-02
• “I’m so glad I wasn’t in production today! I would have been shoved to the ground!” —Cazes Verbois, middle school intern, after breaking news 05-09-02
• “Like when I take percocet for my kidneys…all I can do is stare…I look like my poodle.” —Jim Roberts, reporter 04-24-02
• “If I had only one phone call from jail, I’d probably call Structure to see if an arrest would affect my credit.” —Chris Redford 04-16-02
• Mark Rowlett, meteorologist: “You don’t know all the reindeers’ names?”
  Lindsay Holman: “Dopey, Sleepy, Sneezy and Grumpy.”
  Mark: “No, those are the anchors.” 12-24-03
• “Oprah needs to feed those girls some sandwiches!” —Kevin Fentress, watching Victoria Secret models on Oprah 12-04-03
• “Polygamy is not high on my agenda.” —Jim Roberts/Thanksgiving, 2003
• “If push comes to shove, I could lose all self respect and become a reporter.” —Charles Barkley
• “You might want to throw an extra blanket on the fire tonight.” —Sherri Allen, on air 11-14-03
• “I’m just going to start thinking before I speak.” —Jody Lowery, anchor/reporter 11-14-02
• “If you ordered 20 pizzas, your pizzas are in the lobby.” —Sue, receptionist, station page 11-13-02
• “Hey, Sherri. Hey Tim Fletcher’s hair.” —Viki Fentress to Sherri, who was wearing a furry coat 11-07-03
• “You ate a salad? On purpose?” —Kevin Fentress 10-09-02
• “Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights make an airplane.” —Dr. Donald Mack 10-09-03
• “There are beef cattle with more choices than I have.” —Tim Fletcher 10-01-03
• “Anybody planning on coming to Neima Felan’s baby shower, head to the lobby…let’s party!” —Sue, receptionist, station page 09-25-03
• “I have the metabolism of a sloth.” —David Paige 09-02-03
• “Did you know that Mike Smith (director) once rode through the Burger King drive-thru on horseback and ordered a Coke?” —Sherri Allen 08-26-03
• “You know, a ten foot bass would be like Orca….Orca Bass.” —Deep thoughts by Colleen Spillane 06-26-03
• “When do we get to start hunting out there at Chimp Haven?” —Kevin Fentress 05-30-03
• “Who took Charlie’s training wheels off his bike? That was low!” —AJ Willen, photographer, after Charles Hadlock’s bike wreck 05-28-03
• Jody Lowery: “Can what I said be the quote of the day?”
  Sherri Allen: “No, we have boy scouts coming through here on tours.” 05-06-03
• “The early bird might get the worm, but it’s the second mouse that gets the cheese.” Anonymous
• “Colleen can clip her toenails in one state and they can land in the other.” — Jason Weimar, referring to Colleen being on Stateline Avenue in Texarkana 04-24-03
• Tim Fletcher looking in a thesaurus: “What’s another word for sunshine?”
  David Paige: “Dave.” 04-24-03
• “You can kill two stones with one bird.” —Randy Bain, assignments manager 04-17-03
• “Wasn’t Old Yeller in The Sound of Music?” —Joe Haynes, meteorologist 04-15-03