Hazel and Jimmy have just returned from Europe after being on the lam for several months.
The creepy, elderly-looking babies were spotted by authorities who thought they looked out of place in a wholesome park in the Swiss Alps.
Their friends Heidi and Peter quickly threw H&J under the bus when asked how they got overseas without a passport.
The twins aren’t answering my questions about where they were or what they did. Maybe they’ll answer yours.
You can now email Hazel and Jimmy with any personal, career or life questions. Let them help you. Just send your questions to hazelandjimmy@rocketmail.com.
FAQs:
Q: What makes Hazel and Jimmy so special that they think they can help me?
A: Hazel and Jimmy are not licensed or even trained therapists, but just one look into all four of their elderly eyes and you’ll see these babies have been around. You’ll also see a hint of mascera and instantly become either confused or grossed out.
Q: I have very personal issues that I don’t want spread all willy nilly over the world wide web. My question to H&J will be confidential right?
A: Sure, it’ll be confidential. Unless it’s really, really funny.
Q: How do I know I’ll get the right answer to my life questions?
A: It’s not the best advice, but in keeping with the journalistic integrity of this blog, you’ll get two vastly different opinions on your wacked-out issues, because these creepy twins hardly ever agree on much. In fact, I’m pretty sure Hazel is pulling for McCain and Jimmy is an Obama man…uh…woman…girl…toddler type of thing.
